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Kristy Swanson plays Christie Boner in the movie Dude, Where’s My Car?
This scene changed my life when I saw it at a pre-pubescent age.. I wasn’t allowed to watch this part of the movie as it was deemed too inappropriate by my mom. Basically, what happens is Jesse (Ashton Kutcher) and Chester (Sean William-Scott) encounter their ‘dream girl’ Christie, who is deemed “The hottest of the hot” who seems to have a thing for Jesse. After a few words, Christie admits to having fun with Jesse in the back seat of his car the previous night. To which Jesse proclaims he doesn’t remember any of.

Christie “Don’t you remember giving me 500 dollars to show you my hoo-hoos?”
Jesse “500 dollars?”
Christie “You mean you don’t remember anything?”

Before he can find out any clues to the whereabouts of his missing car, Christie wraps her hands around Jesse and advances towards him with a sweet kiss on the lips.

My young mind didn’t know what was happening! Why the smooth jazz music?? Why was Christie making out with Jesse?? Is this why her name is Christie Boner??

Supposedly, this was to see if she could refresh his memory about last night. Christie is all over Jesse while Chester gawks at them. Jesse is shocked he just got a kiss from the hottest girl in town, and just stands there flattered.

“How about now?” Christie asks him with a smile.
“No!” (Jesse blushes)

I was not at all prepared for what was about to come next. I was about to find out why she was given the name Christie Boner.

“How about NOW?”
Christie grabs Jesse’s hand and forces it on her breast. Jesse is so turned on he can’t even speak. Chester gawks at them some more and asks if he can have a turn. Christie squeezes tightly to make sure his hand does not leave her breast. Not long after, the scene is interrupted by Christie’s boyfriend.

WTF? It comes out of nowhere. I had so many things on my mind. Wow, he gets to touch her boobs!? Why is she all over Jesse but not Chester? Who is that actress? This is intense for a PG-13 movie… That guy is so lucky!

Apparently, Christie thought that the more pleasure she gave Jesse, the more likely he would remember what happened last night. Sounds like a lame excuse to have more PG-13 content in the movie, since the scene clearly made no sense. It doesn’t matter though because this scene is awesome and it changed my life. Later I found out that Ashton Kutcher actually had a crush on Kristy Swanson growing up and she just happened to get cast as Christie Boner in this movie. Lucky Ashton!

“Dude that Christie Boner is super hot!”

14 COMMENTS

  1. I had a major crush on Kristy Swanson back in the 90's , she's still the original Buffy to me. Even over SMG

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